


graceful

by lunamars (lunnamars)



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Banter, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:40:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23603206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunnamars/pseuds/lunamars
Summary: Kuina had been all about impetuosity, but Tashigi has always been full of grace.
Relationships: Roronoa Zoro & Tashigi, Roronoa Zoro/Tashigi
Comments: 6
Kudos: 17





	graceful

**Author's Note:**

> My first attempt at writing an AU story, so bear with me, pretty people. And I did intend to make something purely fluffy, but I just couldn’t. I guess I’m a drama queen inside, so let me just tell you there will be some serious matters in the future in case I continue this story. :) 
> 
> By the way, this is inspired in the Cup Noodles commercial and slightly in the Kaizoku Musou collab. 
> 
> The usual reminder: English is not my primary language, so forgive me for any mistakes.
> 
> The usual disclaimer: obviously, I don't own anything in One Piece because if I did, Tashigi would already be a badass bitch and she and Zoro would already be together doing naughty things around the Sunny. Yeah.

"Roronoa, can you please, for the love of God, pay attention to what I'm saying? You can't start the year failing the first test."

It was almost eight p.m and Zoro was already dozing off with his hands in his hair, leaning in Tashigi's table. The boy wasn’t a complete idiot regarding his studies (like his loud best friend Monkey D. Luffy) — he always had satisfactory grades, maybe not the best of their class or even of all the second year's classes, but he wasn’t _bad_. He was just _lazy_.

Kind of a lazy genius in Tashigi's opinion.

However, math wasn’t exactly his forte and Zoro's performance in the latest surprise tests was, to put it simply, going from bad to worse. Something tells her that he had been spending all his free time training and not studying.

"I won't, you know that. I'm not dumb", he rolled his eyes.

That's true. Tashigi knew that Zoro wasn’t going to fail in the end, but the boy right in front of her is not the same easy-going freshman boy of a year ago. The girl has known Roronoa Zoro for her entire life, but since his loss to Dracule Mihawk — the current national Kendo champion — he started to put much more pressure on himself and she started to see less and less of his laid back attitude. 

_It's still there but it's so much more underneath now._

"But you're not brilliant either. So pay attention, moron."

"Haa? Geez, you're so annoying, four eyes", he snorted.

"Yeah? Well, it's this annoying here who's gonna help you be less bad", she glared at him.

"Back at you. You fooled me in yesterday's training but I'm not letting you off the hook. If you keep skipping practice, you won't defeat Torao", Zoro stuck his tongue out.

"Ugh, can you please stop rubbing that in my face? Please, thank you.", she said through gritted teeth.

There were times when she just wanted to strangle him and times when she wanted to strangle herself. Dealing with Zoro has never been easy — Kuina had been so much more skilled than Tashigi in that task — and that's exactly why she keeps wondering why the hell she decided to help him with his lowerest grades. Tashigi is the top student in her class, so it shouldn’t be that difficult, but at the same time, she wondered that anyone else could have helped him — Robin, the most intelligent of the whole second year; or even Sanji, the ladie's man of the school, but equally sharp. 

However, deep down she knew why. That was what she promised herself (and to Kuina, wherever she was) since the death of her dear twin - Tashigi would do whatever it was in her reach to help the dumbass they both called a friend.

 _I mean, Kuina used to call him like that_ , she thought. Tashigi still didn’t know where their relationship actually stands to this day. Maybe childhood friends? Her classmate? Teammates from the Kendo club or just her vice-captain? Colleagues? Acquaintances?

There was a time when Tashigi would do anything for him to be her true friend and recognize her skills. Now not so much.

Besides, she had more serious matters at hand at the moment.

“Look, cap’n, I have no idea how the hell did you lose to Torao, but you can’t lose again. He’s kinda a smooth talker and if he keeps talking you down, he might get your place as captain of the Kendo club”, Zoro said casually.

“I know, I know! I did one mistake, ONE mistake and it came back to bite me in the-”, she gulped and then lowered her voice, “ass”.

Zoro laughed out loud and said, “You’re still uptight even after all these years. Always funny”. He took a handful of the chips she separated for them to eat while studying, stuffed in his mouth and started chewing loudly.

Just like she hated.

“How can you be so insufferable like this?”, she eyed him disapprovingly.

“Well, I ask you the same, four eyes”, he simply shot her a crooked smile. 

“Stop being a child and let’s continue. We still have a lot to do”, Tashigi fixed her glasses and turned her attention to the probability and statistic problem before them. She had already solved that, of course, but Zoro was having a slight problem with mutual exclusivity. He scoffed but complied anyway. 

Tashigi smiled softly but said nothing. She leaned back in her chair, brought the table lamp closer to him and then crossed her arms, watching him. _His pensive expression is still the same as when he was just a skinny brat_ , she thought. In fact, it's not just his expression, his _essence_ is almost the same - the bright green hair, the usual scowl, the super dark blue eyes, the cocky attitude, the all high and mighty way of walking, the harsh words but kind gestures underneath, the flawless swordsmanship skills, the mysterious three earrings. Zoro is not just that but that’s a good sum up in Tashigi's opinion. _He's got a nice smile too._

“It’s rude to stare”, he said without looking at her.

“I-I w-was not staring!”

“Yes, you were, you weirdo”, he looked out of the corner of his eye.

Tashigi just glared at him and pouted. She was staring at him indeed, but wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of a victory — which is basically what they have been doing their whole life. _Anyway, better finish my homework too_. And in silence, they remained — Zoro with a barrage of math problems she set up for him to solve and Tashigi with her literature homework. She couldn’t afford to daydream about the green-haired boy while she had such an important essay ahead of her - life and works from female poets all around the world.

I mean, it wasn’t supposed to be just about female poets, but Tashigi picked a fight with her teacher and claimed it was unfair the women weren’t being included, considering how influential some of them were. After a long debate, the girl won and vowed to do a perfect job.

She had about a month to finish it, so honestly, _When Great Trees Fall_ by Maya Angelou couldn’t wait.

Tashigi always loved poems and books and stories — things that Kuina firmly disliked. Her twin used to say that Tashigi was a complete romantic at heart, but the captain never agreed or disagreed. She has always kept her feet on the ground, but dreaming once and a while wouldn’t hurt anybody. 

Besides, written words have always made her feel more comfortable than spoken words. And because of that, she normally writes it down instead of reading out loud — especially if the piece is in another language other than Japanese. So she picked the poem, started reading and translating internally and then writing it in her notebook.

_“When great souls die,_

_the air around us becomes_

_light, rare, sterile._

_We breathe, briefly._

_Our eyes, briefly,_

_see with_

_a hurtful clarity.”_

A hurtful clarity. A painful memory.

She scribbled some more.

_“Our memory, suddenly sharpened,_

_examines,_

_gnaws on kind words_

_unsaid,_

_promised walks_

_never taken.”_

Kind words left unspoken, kind gestures left unshown, questions she knew the answer. 

"What are you doing?", he asked after the long silence.

Her hand jerked and she eyed him suspiciously. _Small talk?_

"It's a literature assignment. About female poets."

He stopped solving his math problems and looked over her shoulder to see what she was scribbling. His breath close to her neck made a shiver run down her spine and she resisted the urge to turn her head in his direction.

"Uhmm, English?"

"Y-Yeah. M-Maya Angelou. American poet."

"I don’t understand poetry and shit. Too complicated. Why these freaking poets don’t say clearly what they want? Fucking stupid."

Tashigi just rolled her eyes, "You're an ogre and would never understand."

"What-? I'm not an ogre, you damned woman!"

She snorted and said, 'Yes, you are. The only thing you know is how to swing a sword."

"You-! I'm really gonna kick your ass on Monday, four-eyes", he shot a cocky smile.

"Whatever."

Zoro detached from her shoulder and resumed solving his problems again. _So unfair that he comes and goes unaffected_ , she thought. Tashigi glared at him and went back to her own work. To no avail. The green-haired boy invaded her mind and made a home as usual. She hates that she always thinks about him more than she should.

"What is that poem is about?", Zoro asked without turning in her direction. She looked at him and realized he finally picked up the pace and the Math problems were being solved at an impressive speed. _As I thought. He just needs to put a little bit of effort._

"Loss and death", she said in a small voice.

"Mm, I see".

She saw how his shoulder tensed and the frown that appeared in his features. He knew what she was talking about, after all, both of them felt it in their hearts and it plagues their mind every single day. It still burned and it still hurt. So she asked Zoro the same question she always asks on every May 16th for the past five years. 

"You're coming with us tomorrow?", Tashigi feigned interest.

"Have I ever missed it?"

Tashigi just shook her head, "Pick you up around 8 a.m. then?"

"Mm-hmm", he hummed.

_“Great souls die and_

_our reality, bound to_

_them, takes leave of us.”_

_Yeah. Great souls die._

“Okay.”

.

.

.

.

.

The biggest convenience of Zoro living in the building next to Tashigi’s house is that, normally, he’d be able to be a little late and it wouldn’t be too troublesome. What is actually troublesome is when she was the one who was late and Zoro was involved. Being on time is something that she takes really seriously, so when these rare occasions occurred, the green-haired boy would never let her hear the end of it.

When she left the dojo, her father and Zoro were already outside casually talking.

"Zoro-kun. Good morning", her father said with his usual peaceful demeanor.

"Sensei", Zoro just nodded.

Tashigi hurried and joined them at the dojo entrance, "I'm coming! Sorry, I'm late, forgot my glasses!"

"As usual. C'mon, annoying woman, we're late", he rolled his eyes.

"Just shut up, Roronoa. It’s not 'as usual'!"

"Haa? You shut up", the height difference gives him the advantage of towering over her easily and Tashigi did not like to give him a simple win like that.

"You both are always fighting, kids", her father sighed. 

"It’s her/his fault!", they both said at the same time. She glanced at him and he did the same. It was weird sometimes, how they had this strange good timing. Tashigi tried to never dwell on that.

"Well, whatever. Let's go", Zoro turned and started walking without another word.

It was a beautiful Saturday — the weather was nice, the cool spring wind blowing through her hair; there was no sound of cars and traffic, just the soft sound of little birds; the trees were already full of colorful flowers, beautiful as that only season could provide. Tashigi, Zoro and her father walked in a tranquil pace, with no rush and no anxiety. And there was no need — they have been doing that stroll every May 17th for the last five years.

Their destination wasn’t unknown to them and the feeling of longing was quite familiar to the three of them.

They were almost nearing the Buddhist temple full of gravestones and beautiful white cherry blossoms trees around. They bowed slightly before entering through the gates and walked over to purify themselves at the _chozuya_. Then the three of them started walking through a narrow path at their right that they knew by heart, only stopping when reaching a little Jizo statue wearing a red knit cap. Zoro bent down to remove the dead flowers in the vase and Tashigi's father renewed with fresh Sweet Peas to then start cleaning the gravestone. Tashigi fixed the incense stand and light one before fixing her skirt, sitting on her knees and joining her hands to pray.

Cherry blossoms on the ground, the cold and harsh pavement scratching her skin and Tashigi started praying in front of a simple and clean gravestone with a practice sword next to it. 

_"In loving memory of Shimotsuki Kuina, beloved daughter, sister, and friend."_

_Hello, sister._

Tashigi heard the rustle of clothes and assumed Zoro and her father were doing the same.

_I hope you're doing okay. We're doing okay. Father is still teaching in our dojo and now is training the kids harder so they can compete in the regional championship and then, with a lot of hard work, in the national championship. You know how strict he can be._

Tashigi smiled softly.

_School's okay too. My first year of high school went well, I was able to become one of the top students, along with Robin-san. She's really smart. Now I'm in my second year and the school year has just begun, but I decided to start preparing for Law school already. I mean, I don’t want to lose my mind next year._

Tashigi chuckled quietly because Kuina would have scolded her if she could. _"I don’t want to know about the school, Tashigi!"_

_I'm doing a literature assignment by the way. About female poets. I know you never liked that, but I know that you liked to fight for girls representation. My teacher is a moron, but I was able to convince him to let me do it. He wanted us to pick any male poet and I was outraged that he didn’t even give us an option to chose a female poet. Stupid man._

Tashigi took a deep breath.

_Roronoa competed in the national championship last year, sister. He's considered a prodigy, did you know that? One of the youngest competitors in a long time. The regional championship was an easy ride for him, but the national one was tough. But… he didn’t win, Kuina. Dracule Mihawk won once again. That man is a beast. Roronoa was devastated because he wanted the first place, but I was kind of angry with him. I mean, he was a rookie, he had never been in a big competition like that, but won second place either way! He's really an idiot._

Tashigi could feel her eyes watering — as usual. Year after year, it was the same pattern. Now that she was older, in her sixteen years of youth, she was able to maintain her composure better at least. But the longing was there — making tears prickle in her eyes, making her lips start to tremble and sobs threaten to scape. It was always too much for her to bear. She sniffed quietly.

_I became the Captain of the Kendo club, sister. I admit I'm not training in the dojo that much anymore. I prefer to train in my bedroom or in the garden of our house or even at the club. Sometimes I have the impression I'm losing touch or getting weaker. If you were here, how strong would you be, Kuina? I've always tried to reach you and Roronoa. I wish I did before you were gone._

So many delightful moments they had. Playing in the training grounds, sparring inside the dojo, beating up some stupid boys who had the audacity to defy and mock the Shimotsuki sisters, running and climbing on trees fleeing from their father's sight, scaring Zoro in the middle of the night and making him run out screaming around the house.

_There is this guy that entered the club and he… he challenged me, sister. His name is Law. Trafalgar D. Law. Or just Torao, how his friends call him, but he doesn’t like that very much. He challenged me and won. I was careless and dropped my glasses before charging at him. I lost in front of the whole club, he laughed and I just wanted to cry. I made a fool out of myself. I was so angry that day._

Tashigi always wondered if that was the right way to pray for a dead person. But she wanted Kuina to hear her stories and not to hear her mourning the whole time. Her sister has always been a lively (and cocky) girl so Tashigi thinks she'd have liked to hear about different things. 

She opened her eyes and stared idly at the gravestone. A simple white and dull gravestone that didn’t represent her late sister's personality at all. The only thing that personified her was the practice sword next to it and her beloved Sweet Pea flowers.

The gravestone next to her sister’s had a vase full of Red Spider Lilies. Red flowers of death. Red as Kuina’s blood on the floor of the dojo.

Tashigi shook her head repelling that train of thought and continued her ranting.

_I asked Roronoa to help me train and in turn, I'd help him with Math and English. We're in springtime, Kuina. A time to restart. We've known each other since we were kids but never truly bonded. I know I'm not you and the affection he still feels for you is really big. But I want to make some changes this year. I'm too uptight, too strict and made some choices I regret, I hardly have fun with friends or hardly have friends for that matter. I'll try to be a good friend to Roronoa. He suffered just as I did when you were taken from us._

_A time to restart._

Tashigi looked up at the sky like it could give her some answers or show her how to be confident, to give her strength and a strong spirit. Or maybe she had the habit of projecting her sister in the clean sky. Kuina would probably be beyond the clouds, living happily while Tashigi was here to pay for her mistakes.

_A time to start._

_Maybe this year I can start to forget about him._

She frowned.

_What do you think, sister? Do you think I can finally get over Roronoa?_

She glanced at him from out of the corner of her eye and realized he was still saying his prayers. Tashigi was still amazed by the fact that they have known each other since they were kids (he even lived with them for a while!), but yet, she couldn’t read him fully. They do tend to spend a lot of time together — the practices, the tutoring classes, their responsibilities in the Kendo club, going to school and coming back home together — but they were still on different wavelengths. He used to be so in sync with her sister that now that Tashigi was the one left, it seemed out of place. Deep down, he has always been a grumpy boy, but since her death, he became even more closed up and now, after his loss to Mihawk, he seems so distant from reality. 

But they did share two common things: the love for swords (and swordsmanship) and the belief that they don’t need their youth.

Tashigi wanted to become a lawyer and for now, Zoro wanted to defeat Mihawk. And if to achieve that, they had to give up part of their teenage years, then so be it. 

(It seems Monkey D. Luffy didn’t agree with that - he's always dragging the both of them around.)

_I miss you, Kuina. And I’m so so sorry._

She got up and realized her father was still praying, but Zoro was already leaning in the cherry blossom tree with the familiar faraway look when he was deep in thought. 

Or grieving.

She couldn’t say which one he chose now.

Tashigi walked over to his direction, leaning in the tree and staying next to him in silence. They knew how to keep a comfortable silence and she has always been thankful for that. But sometimes… sometimes she just wanted to truly tell him her feelings and ask what he’s thinking at the moment. Everything about them has always been something superficial, never deep. 

And sometimes she wanted to talk to him like two complete strangers who would confess to each other secrets no one else knows because they’d never ever meet again.

(That has never happened.)

The cool wind blew, making a single cherry blossom flower drop in Tashigi’s hand. White and beautiful as the crest of a wave; white as the cloth that covered her sister’s face. The thought made her shudder.

Tashigi threw the flower on the floor and spoke her heart out. 

"I miss her too, you know?"

"Yeah. I know", Zoro said in a hushed tone.

"She was amazing", Tashigi sighed. It wasn’t jealousy that drove her sigh, it was a true sadness.

"She was", he was looking to the clear sky above them. The quietness of the temple was starting to irk her. Every May 17th was the same — in the end, she ends up wanting to talk. She ends up wanting to know how he was feeling. "You really liked her, didn’t you Roronoa?"

"Yeah, I did", she had to get closer to be able to hear his voice.

"She liked you too. Although she used to call you dumb."

“You seem to continue her tradition.”

“Because you are dumb indeed.”

Zoro just scowled at her, "I'm gonna kick your ass, four-eyes."

"Hey! Watch your language! We’re in a sacred place", Tashigi fixed her glasses and returned the glare.

They heard the rustle of clothes and realized her father had already finished his prayers, already getting ready to leave. It was time to go home and she knew the ride would be made in complete silence with occasional quiet sniffs from her father. 

He used to walk ahead of them so they wouldn’t see him and Zoro and Tashigi never said a word. 

Koushirou waved at them with a small smile, indicating to them they all could leave now. And as expected, the return home was made in a strained silence. 

A silence full of guilt that hasn’t gone away even after five years.

"It's easier to kick your ass than kick hers back in the days by the way."

"Yeah. I know."

_"And when great souls die,_

_after a period peace blooms,_

_slowly and always_

_irregularly. Spaces fill_

_with a kind of_

_soothing electric vibration."_

_I’m so sorry, sister. If I had been stronger…_

“Four eyes.”

“Mmm?”

“Are you okay?”

“Yes. You?”

“Yeah.”

“Good.”

“Everything is gonna be okay, cap’n”, Zoro nodded as if to assure her and himself at the same time. He put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed lightly. She felt warm inside. Once and a while he’d be gentle like this.

“Thanks, Roronoa”, she smiled softly at him and he returned the smile. _We are so weird. What are we to each other?_

“Don’t forget to mentally prepare to get your ass kicked Monday”, Zoro sneered.

“God. Why are you like this?”, she grimaced.

Roronoa Zoro just smirked and poked her forehead.

_"Our senses, restored, never_

_to be the same, whisper to us._

_They existed. They existed._

_We can be. Be and be_

_better. For they existed."_

.

.

.

_You existed, Kuina._

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah, in this story, Tashigi and Kuina are twins. Sue me.
> 
> • Jizo statues represent Jizo Bosatsu, a divinity in Japanese Buddhism who also protects children who have died before their parents.
> 
> • Chōzuya is a Shinto water ablution pavilion for a ceremonial purification rite known as temizu.
> 
> As I'm not Japanese, I'm not familiar with all the traditions, so if something is completely wrong (for example, I'm not sure if there's a Chōzuya in a cemetery, so I'm just assuming), please let me know.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
